It's my birthday

Today is my birthday. I am 40. As each birthday has passed, approaching this day, I’ve dreaded turning 40 more and more because I hadn’t started a family, I hadn’t met a man to enjoy life with. I tried to tell myself that I didn’t need to wait for life to start until I had a family; that a man wasn’t the end all to life, that children are sticky and messy and keep you up at night. And for the most part, I’ve had a great life. I love my family and my nephews and my friends and my job. But you know, I WANTED children! I got sad when I saw moms and their cute kids at the store, when I saw my friends on Facebook getting married and having kids, when I watched my sister with her family, and all the special little moments with her boys (and I’ve enjoyed some special moments with them, too!). It’s just that envy I think one gets because of social media, and how perfect everyone else’s lives look! So I constantly reminded myself that I had a great life, and also I stayed off Facebook. :)

So I’m turning 40. And it’s still annoying because I still feel like I'm 25. But I couldn’t feel more lucky that I’m starting a new adventure with Gracie.